*Sigh*

Please don't take this personally anyone, but I'm generally pretty traditionalist with music. I have little appreciation for what I have told people is "children's music." But then I realized that just means I'm getting old. So I'm going to appeal to a slightly younger crowd today. As such, here is:

Yes. That's right. "Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)" by Katy Perry. I don't know about this modern stuff but I'm trying, dammit! Here we go:

There's some pot inside my bong,
Now it won't be very long,
I'll be acting like a fool
I'm about to take a pull,
I have packed it really tight
Now I think that I just might,
Go on out and take a drive*
Man I feel so alive
I will be so stoned
That I won't come down,
I'm high
Oh well,
It's a happy time,
And now my mind is saying,
"Bye-bye"

Damn!

I got so high,
I was eating cookie dough,
Dancing 'round to a banjo
Yeah I too too many tokes
I got so high
Now I'm having some strange thoughts
Can a chimpanzee tie knots?
I might have had too much pot

I got so high,
Let's go smoke another blunt,
And pull off some crazy stunts
Hope the cops aren't on the hunt
I got so high,
Yeah I know I broke the law,
But I'm never going to stop-op
Whoa-oh-oah

I'll get so high
Do it all again,

I'll get so high
Do it all again,

Trying not to say "I forgot"
And eating some Dippin' Dots
Think I need some water now,
My whole brain has gone "ka-pow"
With my favorite group of friends,
I escaped a bitter end,
I have had the strangest time,
Oh this crazy life of mine

I will be so stoned
That I won't come down,
I'm high

Oh well,
It's a happy time,
And now my mind is saying,
"Bye-bye"

Damn!

I got so high,
I was eating cookie dough,
Dancing 'round to a banjo
Yeah I too too many tokes
I got so high
Now I'm having some strange thoughts
Can a chimpanzee tie knots?
I might have had too much pot
I got so high,
Let's go smoke another blunt,
And pull off some crazy stunts
Hope the cops aren't on the hunt
I got so high,
Yeah I know I broke the law,
But I'm never going to stop-op
Whoa-oh-oah
I got so high,

I'll get so high
Do it all again,
Do it all again,
I'll get so high

Do it all again,
Do it all again
I'll get so high

I got so high
I got so high
I got so high
I got so high
I got so high
I got so high

I got so high,
I was eating cookie dough,
Dancing 'round to a banjo
Yeah I too too many tokes
I got so high
Now I'm having some strange thoughts
Can a chimpanzee tie knots?
I might have had too much pot
I got so high,
Let's go smoke another blunt,
And pull off some crazy stunts
Hope the cops aren't on the hunt

I got so high,
Yeah I know I broke the law,
But I'm never going to stop-op
Whoa-oh-oah
I got so high,
I'll get so high,
Do it all again.

* The author of this blog does not condone being high while driving.

Menus...

I thought not so much a menu as guidelines in menu form. Like this:

Except not quite. Instead these are different levels of high that each amount of marijuana causes. But there might also be different levels dependent on the strength of said smoke. So here is a Stoner's Bargain Basement Bakery (Motto: "Our Numbers Are So Low That You'll Be So High"!)

Main Reactions; Each Reaction Can Come With Up to Two Sides; Sides Available If Not Otherwise Stated

Calmed Down................................. 1.00 Hit  (No sides available)
Mild Buzz........................................2.00 Hits
Relaxed...........................................2.50 Hits
Stoned.............................................4.00 Hits
Baked..............................................5.00 Hits
Blitzed...........................................8.00 Hits
Burnt...............................................10.00 Hits

Side Reactions; First Rock Out to Jimi Hendrix Free, All Other Sides Extra
Rock Out to Jimi Hendrix................1.25 Hits
Rock Out to Quiet Riot......................3.00 Hits (Not available with Mild Buzz or Relaxed)
Munchies.............................................2.00 Hits
PARA BAILAR A LA BAMBA!.......7.75Hits (Only Available with Blitzed and Burnt)

Thoughts

OK, I clearly can't title a post right now. Anyway, I just thought it was funny that I thought of an idea. I look every bit the straight-laced drone when dressed for business, but When I get home I immediately change into jeans and a shirt, and um... Well anyway (I in no way condone any illegal activity so I'll stop there). I then, regardless of my mental state (which is unquestionably sober, of course) change from a Clark Kent to... Stonerdude!

Look! Up in the air! It's a bird. No, It's a Plane,
No! It's Stonerdude!
Faster eater than a Hungry Hungry Hippo!
More difficult to talk to than a brick wall!
Able to eat lots of Gnutella in a single gulp!

All right, that's all I have for today. Yeah.